If your eyes aren't so good, here's what it is: Brocabulary: The New Man-i-festo of Dude Talk by Daniel Maurer. Essentially, it's a guidebook for rad bro phrases to use when speaking with the special dudes in your life. Periodically, I'm gonna post some of these phrases. In honor of the bro who gave it to me, I'll kick things off with Rickey's favorite entry from the book thus far...
deuceappear - To disappear in order to drop a deuce; split and shit.
The entry is pretty lengthy for this one, so here are a few highlights:
...as you know, when someone is in your immediate pissinity--i.e. standing at the urinal next to yours--you have a choice between the thousand-tile stare (staring straight ahead at the wall tiles in a zen-like trance) or the pants-down glance down (fixing your gaze on your own member). When the urinals have no privacy barrier, you're obliged to employ the thousand-tile stare, lest your neighbor think you're giving him a "glans glance." When there is a privacy barrier, it's a matter of personal preference...
...of course, somestimes you just have to tell your bro, "Tough shit, I'm taking a dump." That's fine, but at least have the courtesy to wear a stall shawl--take your shirt off and wrap it around your shoulders to keep it from absorbing the stink...
More to come!
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