The History of the X-Men in December

UNCANNY X-MEN #491 (2007)

This was the conclusion to Ed Brubaker and Salvador Larroca’s “Extremists” storyline, the final issue of Uncanny before Messiah CompleX kicked off, and—to the best of my knowledge—the last really significant appearance by the Morlocks. There’s an interesting cameo from Magneto as we learn part of Masque’s whole plan in unearthing/fabricating ancient Morlock prophecies was to rile the Master of Magnetism up into being a mutant baddies again, but instead Skids turns out not to only be a secret S.H.I.E.L.D. agent, but also have loyalty to Mags, whom she reports on the whole event to as he plots his comeback (it would happen about a year later when the X-Men relocated to San Francisco); neat continuity nod by Brubaker, as Skids was a former Acolyte of Magneto. My favorite bit about this issue though was a conversation Hepzibah has with Cyclops asking his permission to basically have sex with Warpath, because she was dating Scott’s dad but he’s dead now; it’s awkward and weird and somehow made perfect sense because Hepzibah is a crazy alien humanoid skunk so why not. I greatly enjoyed the Hepzibah/Warpath pairing—and Hepzibah as an X-Man in general—so it’s a shame it got more or less cut off when the latter moved over to X-Force and they drifted apart; either or both character would make a great addition or additions to either current X-Force book. Where’s Sam Humphries’ number (speaking of which, in the Endangered Species back-up, Beast tries to get Spiral—of Uncanny X-Force by Sam Humphries fame—to help him with his mutant extinction problem, but it’s no dice, so off to Doctor Strange)…

UNCANNY X-MEN #414 (2002)

I remember this story well as Chuck Austen’s first standalone issue of Uncanny X-Men, and one I thought boded well for his future writing the book. Northstar is the focus as Professor X offers him a teaching position, which he turns down, but he does agree to transports a young boy with an uncontrollable mutant power causing his to explode from Canada to the U.S. for treatment (he can’t travel by plane because he might blow it up, but Northstar can move fast enough to escape the explosion—there are probably holes in the plot, but I liked it enough to ignore them). It’s a clever structure that allows Austen to introduce the various aspects of Northstar—he’s arrogant, he’s gay, he doesn’t have a lot of patience—to an audience that might now know him while also keeping a compelling story going with a literal ticking time bomb. Some of it comes off a bit heavy handed (the stuff about homosexuality), but not so much that it derails the rest of the story; by the end, I felt connected to Northstar, but his edgier qualities weren’t diminished. Sean Phillips provides art and turns in really strong work, demonstrating how good he is at conveying tension and making quiet moments dramatic.

UNCANNY X-MEN #350 (1997)

I picked this issue up of eBay or some other online dealer during my post-college attempt to acquire the full run of the series (I did not complete it, but did pretty well). It’s got a holo-foil-something cover and features the “Trial of Gambit,” revealing at long last Remy Lebeau’s secret past that had been touted as a huge deal for several years. The big revelation was that when he was a mercenary/thief, he took a job for Mister Sinister and recruited the Marauders, who then went on to perform the Mutant Massacre. I guess playing a fairly key role in such a big tragedy in X-Men history is significant, but I always felt like this was a letdown, in that Gambit didn’t actually do anything bad directly—arguably—he was just the guy who enable bad stuff to happen; it made him redeemable, but also lacked punch in my opinion. It certainly didn’t seem like enough for Rogue to leave him stranded in Antarctica, which she does at the conclusion of this issue. There were some nice touches, like Archangel—who lost his natural wings as a result of the Massacre—being forced to play the role of Gambit’s defense attorney and then freaking out on him midway through the trial when the truth is unveiled. There’s also Spat and Grovel and the end revelation that the guy conducting the trial is Magneto dressed as longtime X-Men in-joke Erik the Red, a pretty poorly kept secret. Great art by Joe Madureira, who was winding down his X-Men run, I believe.

UNCANNY X-MEN #295 (1992)

Now we’re talking—“X-Cutioner’s Song,” aka my favorite X-Men story of all time! When I was 10 years old I was racing to the card shop a few blocks from my house each week with my friend Matt to grab these and then tear the polybags off ASAP. The big draw in this installment was the full-fledged return of Apocalypse, and since I was still  newbie, this was my first real exposure to the character. It was only later when digging into back issues I’d learn Apocalypse was more of a behind the scenes schemer, because here he wipes the floor with Storm, Colossus, Beast and Iceman (I think) and looks darn impressive doing so. Brandon Peterson’s art style was completely different back then from what it’s evolved into today, but I thought he rendered a bad ass Apocalypse, particularly post-battle when he’s shifting back into his usual form, excess mass literally dripping back on as he stands all cool. This issue was also notable for one of the crossover’s many classic melodramatic soliloquies from Stryfe, Cable running into Wolverine and Bishop to set up a big fight the next week in X-Factor, and a fun scene in which Havok and Gambit good cop/bad cop Cannonball into helping them track down the Dark Riders. It’s also noteworthy as the Uncanny X-Men chapters of “X-Cutioner’s Song” had the Uncanny part of the logo running up and down to the left of X-Men as opposed to above, the only time I can ever recall that happening.

UNCANNY X-MEN #224 (1987)

I honestly have no idea what happened in this issue. I own it, but I can’t remember what happens in it. Something with Longshot and Havok, presumably. Marc Silvestri drew it and it’s the final issue before Fall of the Mutants—that’s all I’ve got.

UNCANNY X-MEN #164 (1982)

In the midst of the Brood saga, this is an issue of transformations, where Carol Danvers, the former Ms. Marvel, gets messed with by the aliens turning her into Binary, while back on Earth between pages Colossus’ little sister Illyana gets kidnapped to Limbo and returns as Magik. Obviously Magik remains a vital part of X-Men lore today—despite dying for a decade or two—while Binary went back to Ms. Marvel then to Warbird then back to Ms. Marvel and now she’s Captain Marvel. I’ve enjoyed Carol Danvers in all her incarnations, but Binary always get a bit of the shaft, I felt, joining the Starjammers then not being seen for years at a time. Dave Cockrum gave Binary a great design and the idea of the Earthborn hero exploring the cosmos is one I always feel has juice; her powers weren’t anything special, but there’s something very neat in her having not adjust merely to having them, but that they’re different from the Ms. Marvel abilities she’s used to. Indeed I think the fact that Carol had years of experience as a tenured but very different hero could have been the twist that accelerated her, but oh well, what we’ve got now is pretty great too. This issue also contains the crushing scene where Wolverine finally lets his teammates know they’ve got Brood eggs growing inside them, essentially delivering a death sentence and leading to some intense and emotional stuff to come, particularly from Colossus and Kitty Pryde.

X-MEN #108 (1977)

The conclusion to the original Phoenix Saga, written on a grand scale by Chris Claremont with Dave Cockrum really getting to show off with dozens of characters and the most exotic settings imaginable. The X-Men and Starjammers team up for the first time, we get introduced to the impish but nigh omnipotent Jahf—who punches Wolverine through space—and Phoenix prevents D’Ken from getting his hands on the M’Kraan Crystal, setting the table for years of cool stories featuring the Shi’ar. There’s also a nice quiet moment after the action where Corsair learns via Phoenix that Cyclops is in fact his long lost son, but requests she not tell him, feeling like the absence of a relationship where there could have been one will hurt more than thinking one another dead. This whole story was adapted pretty perfectly for the animated series in the 90’s, particularly a feat when considering any adult or violent themes had to be removed and the likes of Colossus and Nightcrawler got subbed out for Rogue and Gambit.

First Impressions: X-Men

A little while back, I talked about how one random issue of Avengers read out of context as a kid made me averse to the franchise for years; this time around, I’m going to give an example of the opposite.

The first X-Men comic I ever read was Uncanny X-Men #229, which came out in mid-1988 when I was six, but that I most likely read a couple years later. As with that Avengers issue I referred to earlier, I’m fairly sure this came from a combo back my dad picked me up from a supermarket or somewhere (I mentioned this to him the other day thinking he wouldn’t remember and he definitely did; he remembered getting me my first issue of Pro Wrestling Illustrated, with a WWF vs WCW face-off feature and Kerry Von Erich poster—my dad is awesome).

I know now that this was the first issue of Uncanny X-Men (aside from a fill-in standalone story) set after the Fall of the Mutants event, which I now own years later in trade paperback and—more importantly—at the end of which the X-Men “died.” The use of quotation marks there was to denote that while the X-Men did sacrifice their lives to stop The Adversary, Roma resurrected them by using the Siege Perilous and they elected to allow the world at large to continue thinking them dead so they could operate in secret.

Had Uncanny X-Men #227 been the first issue I had read, there’s likely an equal chance I would have said “Huh? I’m out” as “What? I’m in.” I’m honestly not sure if I’d have been put off by such a crazy, continuity-mired capper involving so many weird mystic elements or if it would have spurred me on to want to know more because I’ve had both experiences with comics (off the top of my head I can remember being fascinated by the complicated layers of Legion of Super-Heroes lore and at the same time uninterested in how established and pat the relationships were in Fantastic Four as a kid).

But I didn’t read issue #227 first, I read #229, and it was maybe the best jumping on point for any comic I could have asked for.

Before I go any further, I should note that both issues in question and the entire era of X-Men surrounding them were written by Chris Claremont with this specific period being drawn by Marc Silvestri. Claremont is capable of massively intricate years-long storylines that only his hardcore readers can appreciate, but I think over time people have also forgotten how good he was at remembering every comic was somebody’s first and making sure you always got a sense of the characters right off the bat. Silvestri was still coming into his own, but his art was so scratchy and energetic I couldn’t take my young eyes off it (I always thought he drew a great Colossus in particular and also made Dazzler seem cooler then I’m ever found her since—sorry, Jim).

So Uncanny X-Men #229 opens in Singapore with a gang of cyborg thugs we would later to come to know as the Reavers robbing a bank, causing some mayhem and kidnapping a young lady who would later become Tyger Tiger. They head back to their base in the Australian Outback via the teleportation powers of their mute and unwilling accomplice, Gateway. Around the same time, the X-Men—led by Storm and consisting of Wolverine, Colossus, Rogue, Havok, Psylocke, Longshot and Dazzler along with Madelyne Pryor—turn up, kick the Reavers’ collective ass in awesome fashion, evict them from their hideout and claim them from their own, save the girl, liberate Gateway, and set up camp.

Roma puts in a cameo at the very end to give the X-Men the Siege Perilous for future use and vaguely summarize the Fall of the Mutants stuff I talked about before, which I didn’t really get, but also didn’t really care about and understood enough for it to frame the story.

The important stuff was I read a story that began with really nasty and vulgar villains being jerks, had the heroes coming in the second act as a totally bad ass cavalry, featured an awesome fight where the bad guys got in just enough offense to keep it interesting but where the good guys really got showcased in all their coolness in a very “appeals to kids” way (Wolverine has claws! Storm shoots lightning! Colossus is made of metal! Havok’s power looks crazy!), then wrapped up nicely with the clear implication that more was to come but a sense of reader satisfaction with what I’d just gotten.

You hold this up against the Avengers issue I read where the heroes were wearing suits and ties and got beat up by a tiny lady-turned-sea monster while a bunch of subplots reached their midpoint in the background and you can see why I latched onto one and not the other. The X-Men absolutely seemed like the people I wanted to hang out with, tearing into a strange town Clint Eastwood style, cleaning it up, and putting the cherry on top by stealing the jerks’ own clubhouse for themselves; they were the cool older kids you always hoped would show up when you were getting picked on to bully the bullies and send them home crying.

When I got into comics for real a few years later, I immediately gravitated toward the X-Men. Yes, it helped that guys like Jim Lee and Andy Kubert were drawing the book and it was like visual crack to me; yes it helped that crossovers like X-Cutioner’s Song (the greatest comic ever told) were at the height of their popularity and really appealed to me; and yes, it helped that they had an awesome cartoon. But at the end of the day, it was that first impression that not only hooked me there, but made me a fan for life. Every time I’d step away from comics, it would be the X-Men who I wouldn’t be able to resist checking in with and who brought me back, whether it was Onslaught and Joe Madureira in high school, Grant Morrison and Joe Casey (and X-Treme X-Men) in college or so on.

If you know me or have read this blog for any length of time you know I’m a pretty big fan of super hero teams in particular and there aren’t many I don’t have affection for, but there were a lot I had to “grow into.” The Fantastic Four were too domestic until I got to Mark Waid and Mike Wieringo’s stuff; the Justice League was too stodgy and by-the-book until I got to Grant Morrison and Howard Porter’s stuff; the Avengers were the nerds in suits until I got to Kurt Busiek and George Perez’s stuff; even the Legion were fascinating from afar but too heavy until post-Zero Hour. I would later go back and appreciate the goodness that I missed like the Lee/Kirby or Byrne FF, the Satellite Era or Giffen/DeMatteis Justice League, the Stern/Buscema Avengers and the Levitz Legion.

But I never had to be convinced when it came to the X-Men. Claremont and Silvestri got me hook, line a sinker with Uncanny #229. It really is all about timing and luck sometimes, and that was the perfect issue to come into my possession at a formative age and make me an X-Men fan for life.