The setup: Ben has just informed Rickey over AOL Instant Messenger that he may have Sinusitis...
Rickey: sinusitis sounds like a diagnosis you and I would give someone if we were posing as doctors while on the lam (for whatever reason) and got dragged into a room where a lady had nose problems.
Ben: Haha
Rickey: "Sounds like sinusitis to me. Do you concur, Dr. Morse?"
Rickey: "I concur"
Ben: "Absolutely. Sinusitis 100%. With a spot of Douchebagitis."
Rickey: "Perhaps even a touch of boogerlasticity"
Rickey: wow
Rickey: you'd call this lady a douchebag, too?
Rickey: that's over the line
Ben: No way, I'm just saying she might have Douchebagitis
Ben: That's completely different
Ben: If you disagree with my diagnosis, file a report with the hospital
Rickey: we're gonna get sued and caught if you start pulling this crap
Rickey: we gotta stick together
Ben: Look, maybe at first it was about not getting caught, but somewhere along the way, I fell in love...fell in love with medicine
Ben: And if that means diagnosing a woman with a severe case of Douchebagitis, whether you agree or not, by god, I'm going to do what's right
Rickey: fine
Rickey: i
Rickey: ...
Rickey: concur
Ben: Do you...mean it?
Rickey: you know what?
Rickey: i do
Ben: Thanks...partner
Ben: *scene*
Rickey: bow
Hey...I have been a lifelong sufferer of boogerlasticity and I don't appreciate having my condition mocked.
ReplyDeleteYou can't know the pain of trying to wipe a nose troll discretely under your chair, only to have it snap right back with a loud, cartoony "sproing".
And the shame of constantly having to clean your eyebrows when a huge sneeze rebounds & makes you look like you've been using hair gel on your unibrow.
Oh when will the prejudice & ignorance end?
Boogerlasticity Sufferers unite!!
We're not mocking, dudue, we want to help. Call our offices.
ReplyDeleteI would, but my HMO won't cover it.
ReplyDeleteIt's very frustrating...I can never have a mustache.
I thought Prescott Pharmaceuticals "Boogerbegone" was going to help me, but I couldn't handle the side effects...
Extroverted Nostrils
Spontaneous Brain Combustion
and Little Steven Van Zandts
Did you try Dr. Pabst's Baby Booger Bond powder?
ReplyDeleteIt's for baby's, but it works.
Like Ben said, give us a call. We'll set something up.
And you can pay us in Arby's.
We also accept Quizno's.
ReplyDelete